i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
