do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
