Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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