I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
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