He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
