Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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