I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
