You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
You did what with his pubic hair?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
