I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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