She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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