I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Randomize
