if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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