so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
You need Xanax blowdarts
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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