he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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