bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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