Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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