your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize
