I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Small penises have feelings too.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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