So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
