I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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