And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Randomize
