so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
