I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize