the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
