Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
