He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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