I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
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