After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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