Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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