I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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