The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Randomize
