We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
