your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
