You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
