My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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