we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
