Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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