I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I am one with the molecules
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
