just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
