I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
