I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
