End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
