Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Randomize
