I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i think i have herpe
just one?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize
