I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
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