so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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