he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
