Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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