On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
