Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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